Something good to consider, I enjoyed the article.
I think generally, when considering our choice to raise children, get married or not, be alone or not, or whatever, we need to look carefully at the mind. If the motivation is good and clear, than likely we will have good results from what we do. If we are deluding ourselves than the results will never be good.
It is hard for us, because, with the Dharma being so new in the West, no matter what we choose, there is not a lot of precedent or support. I think as a Sangha, the most important thing is to present that: a model and support.
I have met a lot of Dharma babies over the years and most of them are really impressive. No sense of born-againness. Most of their parents educated them in the dharma and if they had interest in meditation, than they helped send them to lamas and meditation masters.
I think this is good. A lot, might I also mention, chose not to peruse Dharma. But the ones who did really understand Dharma deeply, even if on the outside they don't practice as hard as others, the meaning is more deeply imbued.
This should be the point of all Dharma practice; to integrate the teachings deeply into our minds. It is not, as the Dali Lama said, the amount of rituals the do or books we read, but this key point, which really matters. Anything that helps us understand the true meaning of dharma is good practice.
I had an interesting experience some years ago at the Maitreya Relics Tour in Atlanta. There were many children visitors and I noticed one consistent thing throughout the two days I sat in the room.
There was a monk who periodically gave blessings to people with the relics of the Buddha. When a Western child approached the monk they were almost always accompanied at the side by a parent who would bend down and whisper in their ear to tell them what to do (palms of hands together, bow the head). However, when an Asian child approached the monk they were usually accompanied by a grandparent behind them who silently would reach their arms around them, pick up the child’s hands to place them in the proper position, and then lightly touch them from behind to have them bow. This happened over and over and made a huge impression on me.
So what I think I saw, although it is open to different interpretations, is that we Westerners tend to verbally teach a child so that they might learn through the assimilation of knowledge and mental understanding, while the Asian grandparents I watched those two days taught the children through physical example. Perhaps one method is not better than the other. I really have no idea. But, as we seek to impart Dharma to children at Urban Dharma, I would love to see us try both methods and be physical examples ourselves as well as verbal teachers
Something good to consider, I enjoyed the article.
ReplyDeleteI think generally, when considering our choice to raise children, get married or not, be alone or not, or whatever, we need to look carefully at the mind. If the motivation is good and clear, than likely we will have good results from what we do. If we are deluding ourselves than the results will never be good.
It is hard for us, because, with the Dharma being so new in the West, no matter what we choose, there is not a lot of precedent or support. I think as a Sangha, the most important thing is to present that: a model and support.
I have met a lot of Dharma babies over the years and most of them are really impressive. No sense of born-againness. Most of their parents educated them in the dharma and if they had interest in meditation, than they helped send them to lamas and meditation masters.
I think this is good. A lot, might I also mention, chose not to peruse Dharma. But the ones who did really understand Dharma deeply, even if on the outside they don't practice as hard as others, the meaning is more deeply imbued.
This should be the point of all Dharma practice; to integrate the teachings deeply into our minds. It is not, as the Dali Lama said, the amount of rituals the do or books we read, but this key point, which really matters. Anything that helps us understand the true meaning of dharma is good practice.
I had an interesting experience some years ago at the Maitreya Relics Tour in Atlanta. There were many children visitors and I noticed one consistent thing throughout the two days I sat in the room.
ReplyDeleteThere was a monk who periodically gave blessings to people with the relics of the Buddha. When a Western child approached the monk they were almost always accompanied at the side by a parent who would bend down and whisper in their ear to tell them what to do (palms of hands together, bow the head). However, when an Asian child approached the monk they were usually accompanied by a grandparent behind them who silently would reach their arms around them, pick up the child’s hands to place them in the proper position, and then lightly touch them from behind to have them bow. This happened over and over and made a huge impression on me.
So what I think I saw, although it is open to different interpretations, is that we Westerners tend to verbally teach a child so that they might learn through the assimilation of knowledge and mental understanding, while the Asian grandparents I watched those two days taught the children through physical example. Perhaps one method is not better than the other. I really have no idea. But, as we seek to impart Dharma to children at Urban Dharma, I would love to see us try both methods and be physical examples ourselves as well as verbal teachers